phone, at my contact list, at numbers I’d never wanted to use. Payday lenders. High-interest personal loans.
The kind of places that smile too wide and speak too softly while they calculate your desperation.
I went anyway.
The office smelled like cheap coffee and quiet desperation. The man across the desk spoke in calm, rehearsed sentences while his computer calculated my future.
How much of tomorrow I was trading for today. The interest rate was obscene. The repayment schedule was brutal.
“Do you understand the terms?” he asked.
“Yes,” I said.
I signed my name. The surgery was scheduled for two days later.
The morning of the procedure, I lay on a gurney staring at ceiling tiles. Counting the cracks like they might reveal some hidden meaning.
A nurse adjusted my IV. The anesthesiologist asked me to count backward. As the world faded, I thought of my father’s voice.
We






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